The Genetics Game

Genetics play such a huge part in every aspect of our lives. It controls how we develop as babies, how we grow, the food we eat, how species evolve and even whether or not humans are able to reproduce. I, myself, have not been graced with the genetics that allow me to have biological children of my own. I can, however, carry a child as far as the Doctors are aware at this stage of the game.

Currently, we are waiting to hear back from the Geneticist to find out if my husband carries the gene for Cystic Fibrosis. This is not something that couples usually have to endure when planning to start a family. It may be something that sits in the darkest corners of their minds as something they many have to think about down the road, if given reason to do so. We have been forewarned by our donor that when they were conceiving, it was determined that she is a carrier of the gene which causes Cystic Fibrosis. I am happy that it is something we know in advance; however, it is now necessary to find out if my husband is also a carrier. You see, one parent can genetically carry the Cystic Fibrosis gene safely and their children will not be at risk for developing the disease. Now, if both parents are carriers, it causes the pregnancy to be at extremely high risk for developing Cystic Fibrosis. It wouldn’t be a 100% guarantee, but the odds would not be good.

So now we wait. They said it would take six weeks until the results would come back.The majority of the time, I am able to push any thoughts of it to those dark corners of my mind; however, the rest of the time, I start to think about the ‘what ifs’. What if he is a carrier and we aren’t able to accept donor eggs from our donor when the time comes? What if we now need to spend the $45,000 (which we don’t have) to get a donor egg in the US? It’s overwhelming but for now I will push those thoughts down, back into those dark depths and breathe; find the distractions that work, have patience and trust that if it is meant to be it will work out.

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2 thoughts on “The Genetics Game

  1. This may not be much consolation, but you should be able to do a donor egg cycle for about 30k. Unless you don’t live in the US and were referencing traveling here to do it. I empathize with your situation, I went through it, too, until I decided I was tired of the uncertainty and the toll on my body and said, “I’m done.” That’s a decision every woman must make for themselves, I’m not trying to influence you in any way. I’ll be following and rooting for some small victories!

    1. Thank you so much for your reply and support. Unfortunately, we live in Canada where egg donation is not something people can be compensated for; this means that there aren’t egg or sperm banks with waiting donors. We would need to travel to Washington to work with a clinic there in order to get a fresh egg donation. Fingers crossed that things will work out with our known donor so we don’t have to face that route.

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